Thursday, February 5, 2009

Not quite in the groove

So I've completed one week of work. For me, one week is 18 hours spread out over three days. the buildup to starting this week was awful. I knew as soon as I was in the car and driving to work I would feel better, and sure enough I did. Monday and Tuesday were rough - hard getting everyone out of the house by IDT (ideal departure time) of 8:05am and we were about 12 minutes late both days. My time at work was undirected - I wasn't sure what to do and spent a lot of time reading old files. The post work rush to get home and rush to get dinner was stressful. Esther wet her pants at school both days as well, which I don't think had any relation to my being at work, but it was just one more upsetting thing. The most shocking thing was all the chores that still had to be done after work.

But today was better. We were only 8 minutes past our IDT, easy drop-offs, work was interesting, dinner was smoother. And since I don't have to pack lunches for tomorrow or gather stuff together David and I have some time to relax together.

As usual, Elaine offers up wonderful words for reflection. She mentioned that there is value in my kids seeing me go to work and the financial contributions I will make to our household are also significant. I had forgotten about this. I can remember as a child being proud of and excited for my mom when she had a new interest (macrame was one I particularly remember. And around college was when I realized the challenges and sacrifices involved when whe went back to school to get her master's degree when I was 8 and my sisters were 5 and 3. I'm incredibly proud of her for that.

I had been focusing on how I would feel and worried about any negative feelings my kids would experience as a result of me working. I didn't anticipate that they might be excited about this new change in our lives.

Huh, imagine that.


Sue @ My Party of 6 said...

That Elaine is a wise woman! I remember a similar thing when my mom went back to school and then got a job when my youngest brother started 1st grade. I was incredibly proud. And only NOW do I appreciate how hard that really was!

Good for you for making it through the first week! It will only get easier from here. (I think. What do I know? Elaine???)

Stimey said...

Congrats on making it through. I think you're right that you're setting a good example for your kids. That's one reason I make a point to let my guys know that I bring in money and work and creativity to the family too.

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