Friday, February 13, 2009

I do believe...

that I am in a groove.

Really. I think I just might be. Even with Esther having been sick over the weekend and David staying home with her on Monday and Tuesday to make sure she was all, all, better and totally, totally well rested.

Two things happened this past week that made me just about pull a muscle patting myself on the back. First, David went out of town Tuesday evening for a couple days. On Wednesday, Ruthie was going to her sitter, Esther and I were going to run 17 errands on Rockville Pike and then we were going to meet Stimey and Quinn for lunch. NOT ONLY did I get Ruthie to the sitter on time, run my errands with only ONE (1) impulse buy (Dora cell phones on clearance at ToysRUs*), and STILL meet Stimey and Quinn on time, but I did it all WITHOUT YELLING or getting disproportionately frustrated at a kid, and we even had some nice playtime in the morning. While prepping Esther for meeting Quinn, we referred to him as "that little boy named Quinn with the yellow hair." So, she was enchanted with him as I knew she would be and just stared at him quietly for a long time. It was really, really fun to meet someone in person who I read so much of, and I rememberd Stimey's love of fountain diet cokes, and steered her towards a lunch spot with good fountain diet coke. Given our mutual love though, we really should have clinked styrofoam cups with a "cheers!" Although now Esther wants to look on the computer and see "that little boy my friend Quinn." This is now the third time that I've met a blogger IRL and I got butterflies this time just like I did the previous two times. It's cool.

Then, on Thursday, I got everyone up and out of the house BY MYSELF (David was still gone) and still got to work on time. Again, without yelling although I did trick Esther into putting on her own pants my using my kitchen timer.

Speaking of that, it's going pretty well. What I have found is that I can feel good about what I get accomplished during the day without necessarily being passionnate about the product. This is a huge, huge relief to me.

One of the things that's helped me feel this good is, without a doubt, the weather. But also, I've been really, really touched at how kind other women have been to me. An unexpected e-mail or phone call to say "I'm thinking of you;" sincere offers from two SAHMs in my neighborhood to pitch in if I need anything; the name and phone number of a trusted and sought after cleaning woman/housekeeper, another sincere offer from a really good friend who works across the street from the girls' school and has a kid in Esther's class - she said that if I ever forget their lunch that she'll pull something together and take it to them; and, of course, really nice and encouraging comments on my blog. For the 9 years that David and I were married and without kids, I dropped all my friends. It wasn't with mal-intent, I just really wanted to spend all my time with David. And when I think now of not only the good friends that I have and cherish, but also the kindness that has been shown to me by friendly acquaintances, I just can hardly believe my good fortune.

There was only 1-2 times when I detected an undercurrent of snarkiness behind someone's comment. I would be sharing my worries about this transition and I can see in their face or hear in their voice the sentiment of "Oh poor you, having to work 18 hours a week. Wish I was in your shoes." When that wasn't really the point at all. It was disappointing and made me feel as if my worries were totally stupid. Which I knew they weren't.

And so now, this is life. And the new cleaning woman comes for the first time on the 20th. Woo hoo!

*You may be scratching your head at the Dora cell phones, since I often profess to not buy anything with any characters on them because I just abhor the whole tv product placement licensing characters merry go round. But, they were on clearance. And they were really cheap. And honestly, Esther has been asking for a Dora cell phone ever since she saw one like six months ago.


Laurie said...

Wow, kudos to you Ellen for such a smooth transition! I know that there will continue to be ups and downs, but you've managed to really turn things around (and with David out of town) in a very short time! Such a good role model.

Stimey said...

I can't even tell you how happy I was to meet you. We should totally do it again. Maybe we could have a playdate with Sue and Susan! How fun would that be?

And it really was excellent Diet Coke, by the way.

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