I run now, 3 days a week, and I don't make excuses not to go anymore. I don't run for LONG periods of time - I'm almost up to a 90 sec. run, 30 sec. walk for 30 minutes at a time and I generally don't feel like dying, crying, or throwing up. My running stuff is organized - I know exactly what I need so I can grab it and go without too much effort.
I started a Couch to 5K program in late July because a friend was starting it. I decided that I didn't want to be the sort of person who never tries anything new, so I signed up too. The program is okay; it moves too fast for me but I like the camaraderie. I've had two sessions with a friend who is one of those crazed fitness type people and that was amazing. She watched me run, made suggestions on my form and breathing, and it made a huge difference. She's also a devout Catholic, so we say prayers and the rosary while we run.
The girls have had to go with me a couple times. They will walk while I run back and forth or they will ride their bikes. They make helpful comments like: "Way to go mom;" "keep it up mom;" "your butt sort of bounces, is it supposed to do that?" and my fave: "your boobs bounce too, but don't worry, it's not that bad."
I confessed to Beezus that I was scared of running and I was scared of the race. She was so contemplative when I told her that I was scared and nervous but that I was going to do it anyway. She must have told Ramona because she seemed so confused later when asking me why I was going to do something I was scared of!
It feels good to have a project, a goal that I am working towards. I am heavily goal driven, so this works for me. I don't see myself running through the winter and I can't imagine running on a treadmill. I miss working out with my regular cardio group and I'm wondering if running just 2x per week would keep me at my current fitness level so that I don't lose where I am. But honestly, none of that really matters. I'm focused on the race on Sept. 19th and I'll deal with those other issues when the time comes.
My dear friend Elaine gave me some advice that has really stuck with me: "Give yourself a chance to succeed at this." In many ways, I feel like I already have succeeded; but I'll run in the race on Sept. 19th just to be sure.